anonymous Asks ...
I am an alcoholic I guess. I guess I am 4 months sober. I moved to a new city in part to get a break from partying. It has been OK so for. Actually it has been a lot easier to stay sober since I moved away from my mates. Almost like it was the environment making me like I was. I don’t have many friends here yet. My mates are asking me to come back for new years. Is it going to be such a big deal if I go for a few days of partying back in the city and then come back here where I don’t feel the need to drink?
Jim LaPierre Says ...
Hi! Thanks for your question. Your decision to move seems like it was an excellent choice to promote a life in which partying isn't central to socializing. T answer you directly, no it's not a "big deal" but the fact that you're asking suggests that you have some trepidation - some discomfort and I wonder if that's your intuition telling you something. What are the risks of partying? Are your mates likely to engage in high risk behavior? Is it possible that after achieving 4 months sober you find yourself back at square one after some benders over the holidays?
Not knowing more about your life makes it challenging to speculate - there's a nagging doubt within you an I encourage you to listen to it. You know what happens if you go back. What happens if you don't? I encourage you to dig deeper. Have you outgrown partying? There's a time in a person's life when it's just not exciting anymore and we're doing it just cuz everyone else is or because we're bored or lots of other bad reasons.
Do some journaling - get on the same page with yourself about what you want in your life. Make your choices in the full light of day - do you want to be wasted this holiday season or do you want something more/different?