My desire to drink is gone, Am I cured?
Richard Yager Asks ...
I was drinking real bad for years, landed in the hospital with kidney failure the doctors didnt think id make it but did. i stayed sober for like 6 months and then started drinking again, got pancreatitus and in the hospital again, since then i lost the desire to drink. on occasion i will have a couple beers or drinks but not to the point of drunkiness. I just lost the desire to drink anymore like i used too which was a fifth a day or more. at thanksgiving i had 2 glasses of wine and when my son comes home on leave i will have a beer or 2 with him. even now i have a partial 12 pack from when he was here but have no desire to drink any, Christmas is around the corner and i probablly will have some beer or maybe wine but still dont feel like getting drunk. I used to drink til i passed out and when i woke start over again everyday after work and all day on my days off. my question is am i cured or will i relapse...?
Jeannie Cameron Says ...
Mr. Yager, my question to you would be, "Why, if you have no desire to drink, would you keep it in your house and/or even partake of it at any time". It appears to me that you keep it 'just in case'. To answer your question, "Am I cured?" No you are not.
Alcoholism is incurable and can only be maintained on a day to day basis. The mere fact that you are having deleterious health consequences tells me that you have done tremendous damage to your body by digesting this toxic solvent for many years. Unfortunately the organs aren't forgiving and the damage is cumulative. By tempting yourself, keeping it around your house, you are putting yourself in a position to began "drinking heavily again". Alcoholism is a progressive disease, this means when you have a sustained sobriety period and then pick up again you don't pick up where you left off; you pick up again where you would have been had you never stopped in the first place. So my friend it would behoove you to stay away from it like the plague and begin taking care of yourself instead of accelerating your dying process.
As people's organs begin to break down from years of abuse it is probably the most horrific pain and discomfort end of life process there is. Because Alcoholism is a disease, you are not that powerful to quit on your own. You need to be educated on how alcohol affects the body and brain an learn better coping skills than escaping life's problems in a bottle. With the shape of your pancreas any amount of alcohol is damaging to you. I'm sure your son would rather see you have the will-power and self-love to turn away from the bottle and enjoy his company rather than nursing a bottle and emotionally checking out from the relationship you could be nurturing with him while you have the time to be with him.
Please peruse this site for more information on alcoholism. It has a plethora of good advice and questions from individuals just like yourself who are on the brink of death or just not aware of the damage they are causing to their body and their families. Knowledge is power. I hope you arm yourself with it and make better choices for you and your family. I bet they'd like to have you around for awhile. Alcoholism is a selfish disease and it affects no less than everyone in its wake.
Do the next right thing!
Jeannie Cameron, LMHC
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