Hard Habits to Break

It sounds like while you were under the influence you developed some habits that you associate with a sense of nervousness. I'm wondering how often you experience feelings of anxiety while you're clean and sober? Glad you got out of that scene with X and coke but the habits remain. Wearing a retainer makes sense and keeping your hands occupied (stress ball, holding a pen in your dominant hand, doing any kind of craft work) will help you to avoid picking.

I'd urge you to consider how mindful you are of your emotions and to notice feelings of anxiousness, nervousness, or worry and consider coping with these more adaptively. Anything we want to change requires greater awareness - journaling is good for this. I'd also encourage you to have a physical check up with your doctor and ask specifically about the condition of your scalp and see if there are treatment options to help the healing.